GOD INVITED ME TO TRY ON SICKNESS
Sometimes the Good Lord knows just what we need for our next opportunity to grow.
Just the other day I shared this lovely post about my gratitude for our ability and choice to supplement for preventative health care:
(Check out the red underlined parts) Well guess what. Yep. You guessed it. About 3 days later, I came down with a Urinary Tract infection (UTI). Those are the worst! They always hit me when I forget to drink enough water over the course of about 2-4 days and eat too much sugar. This one was confusing though. I had been cutting my sugar intake significantly, not allowing myself more than 25 grams a day. My average was under 15 grams but there were a couple of days where I allotted myself a full 25 grams. One of those days just before that post, I ate a whole Utah Truffle with my girlfriends as we commiserated together over one of them going through a hard time. 20 grams of added sugar.
Normally in the past, I have been so fearful of the pain and intensity of UTIs that I hurry and set up a doctor appointment, pee in a cup in great pain and go to the pharmacy for the antibiotics as quickly as I can. This is kind of out of my character, as I am mostly a home remedy type person with most everything else. Our kids haven't been to the doctor for pink eye, ear infections or anything other than preventative care really. Maybe 1 or 2 kids in 17 years. We have found natural remedies that we can keep on hand and use at first symptom and it usually zaps the infection early on.
So obviously for me to go to the lengths I would to get those antibiotics tells a lot about my lack of trust in my ability to fight a UTI with home remedies.
But this time, I had a desire to try. And I believe as with most strong desires, it was God inviting me to try it. Using personal revelation (communication with God and being able to receive answers) I asked Him if it really was a good idea to fight it naturally, since it can lead to further infection in the bladder and kidneys if not treated. I heard, "Yes. You can fight this UTI naturally. I will help you." I trusted in His answer and moved forward.
I have a good understanding of ingredients that can treat UTI's, and did additional research to see if I'd covered everything-
✔Cranberry- I prefer pills,
✔tons of water,
✔vitamin C and
I had all of them on hand, so I started fighting it. Well 5 days in, though the infection seemed to be squashed during the daytime, I was still waking up in the morning with UTI symptoms, so I decided to take my probiotic at night. That seemed to help a lot with that problem.
On about day 6, I was hit with a fever. I came home from a daughter's lesson and hit the sack at 6 PM. So grateful my kids know how to feed themselves and keep themselves alive. When I awoke 2.5 hours later, I had a headache and all the body aches that come with fever. Prayed with the family, got a tiny bit of food, then went back to bed.
The next day was spent in the valley of the shadow of death. I haven't been so sick since I had Shingles 5 years ago. Fever was 103.2 degrees F, head was swimming and ringing, all I could do was sit or lay around and sleep. Even the Ibuprofen only just took the edge off.
Within those days the sun rays poked through my dreariness in little ways that I cherish though:
My 8 year old was dinner helper one of those nights and made the whole family Ramen noodles. He called everyone to the table for dinner and set the table. I felt so much gratitude for this little helper kid. He was always willing to get me things from the basement pantry, fill up my water bottle and do whatever I needed. And the morning he brought me unsweetened applesauce left a lasting impression. It tasted so incredibly good to me. The thought came, "That is because it was brought to you with love and care. That's why it tastes so good!" He would come to me with hugs and the first thing he'd ask after school was "How are you feeling mom?" I have so much gratitude in my heart for him and the service he gave me through all this!
After a horrid night of fever sweats, having to change my bedclothes halfway through the night because they were soaked, On day 8, I woke up with a monstrous fever and headache that wouldn't allow me to even sit up.
"What is this Heavenly Father?" I asked, "I thought you said I could fight this but its getting worse." >>Then I realized I never asked any details of what fighting this naturally would entail or how long it would take.
Oh how I wanted to just give up trying and go get antibiotics. I considered doing just that the next morning, but first I prayed and had a visit with God. I asked how much longer it would take until I was healed. I felt 4 days. I asked again. "Did I hear that right?" I had it confirmed. And I had the reminder that I was always free to choose to just go get it taken care of. I felt I wanted to move forward and practice surrendering to God. 4 more days would be the end of Sunday night. That would be day 12. I decided to press forward and make a good effort to fulfill my desire to fight this thing naturally. I then requested and received a Priesthood blessing from my husband. Through him, God again stated that I would be able to fight the infection naturally if I desired.
The next 4 days were just a blur of sleeping under a blanket in different positions, sometimes convulsing from chills, sometimes sweating out the fever. I have actually never been sick this long in my life, especially at this level of intensity. Every night I feared sleeping since rather than restful, I faced sleepless nights with either stomach pain, sweats or just fever delirium.
I needed fluids, but digestion problems and vomiting turned my appetite to zero. Water was the enemy. It tasted gross and I just didn't want it in my body.
Ok. So you got the point right? 6 days of fever sucks.
Have you experienced something like this? 😢
I just entered the world of unparalleled empathy for the "sick and afflicted"- and this I suppose could be one of the top reasons why God invited me to go through this.
Day 10 ended excellent. I felt like myself! Ended up being able to go and watch friends and my family at a backyard Barnyard dance! I came home with new immunity boosting ideas from dear, thoughtful friends. And thought I was on the mend. But halfway through the night, got up to use the bathroom, took a drink and vomited. That set a rule in my brain: Water at night = vomiting
Day 11-12: Despite what felt like a turn-around, I was back to my same old feverish sick self, but now with a bad case of bloating and digestive problems. So since Day 12 was the day I had felt and understood God had told me I would feel better, but I seemed to only be getting worse, I planned to call the doctor in the morning.
Day 13: I felt I needed to check the level of severity of the infection. So I made my doctor appointment, peed in a cup, had a blood test to check white blood cell count, which ruled out kidney infection- Thank heavens! And even a stomach x-ray to double check my hernia which I was worried about with all the digestive issues. That just turned up a whole bunch of air. Basically, for the next several days, I was 25 weeks pregnant with an air baby, until the antibiotics and Miralax started to kick in. The doctor prescribed strong antibiotics for my "advanced UTI" and sent me on my merry (?) way.
Day 14: I woke up feeling good- no fever, no headache! So what did I do? Of course, I walked my boys to the bus stop, swept and cleaned my front porch and took care of the chickens.
So, after over doing it, right now, I type in my Snuggy, chilled and trying to avoid coughing because it hurts my head. I am about to go take an IBU Profen- first one for the day. I think I allow my self to suffer longer than is needful sometimes.
For those sitting at the edge of your seats, wondering how it all ends:
The sickness petered out little by little with every blessed 😇antibiotic pill between days 14-18.
So this leaves me and maybe you with the following questions:
•Why, in addition to gaining empathy, did God invite me to go through this?
I feel there is purpose in every experience for our growth and ascension to becoming more like the Savior.
I definitely find myself humbled. Though I have always had a strong immune system, and have often touted that, my life and experiences are ultimately in God's hands. Plus, I recognize that as I age, I may see a decline in my immunity. But here's to hoping I will make lifestyle and health choices that will encourage it to remain strong!
Every time in my life that I fall sick, which truly hasn't been frequent at all, but I've had some doozies, I come out on the other side just bursting with gratitude for good health. And this leads to the deep empathy I then feel for those who don't get to partake in that blessing, either temporarily or long term.
My friend suggested I ask God to show me what has been happening underneath all this physical movement of negative stuff my body was trying to get out. I felt that understanding was worth my efforts. I know there are many other parts of my body in addition to physical, that make up one big whole -->
These are all connected. Emotions can cause physical symptoms, physical sickness can affect me in other areas. I plan to do some meditation and prayer to go deeper and really allow this experience to teach me. Another friend suggested maybe my body is cleaning out old energy and making room for new, higher level energy. She believes I will begin to see more miracles in my life because of this transition. I like to think that is true!
And yet a third dear friend shared the fact that she had experiences like this in her life, where what God asked, just didn't seem to make sense and found it was an excellent time to practice surrendering her will to God and giving everything over to Him. This is an area I have been feeling like I should focus and practice and this sickness gave me that opportunity.
•Could I have truly beat that infection without antibiotics had I kept fighting? Was my definition of "fight naturally" different than God's? Or is my ability to receive personal revelation needing practice?
Even after the sickness subsided with antibiotics, I received the answer that I could have indeed eventually fought that illness without antibiotics. I don't know how long it would have taken, but I wasn't willing this time to make the sacrifice when I am surrounded by ways to receive medical help.
God's timing is often much different than ours. I seemed to be wrong in my thought that 4 days from the time I prayed and asked for a time frame, I would be "healed". This is one of those answers that will go in my "must have gotten the wrong idea from the Lord" files. Our interpretation of what God tries to tell us is sometimes skewed and I am ok with admitting I got the wrong signal. Personal revelation is definitely something that takes practice and I am determined to do so until I am very confident in my communications with God.
•Did I have a lack of faith that caused me not to fully realize the blessing of being able to fight the infection naturally?
I think I had the faith that I could fight the infection with natural means consciously. That's why I allowed myself to be so sick for so long. I had to give it a good try. Possibly subconsciously there might have been some fears that affected my level of faith. By choosing to end it all with a doctor visit and antibiotics, I don't necessarily think I began to lack faith, but rather, I just got sick of doing things on the Lord's time. 🤨 I was sick of being sick when I knew what I needed to feel better was so close within reach.
I have the faith that if there is a time when I don't have access to antibiotics due to a natural disaster or some societal problem, that I could turn to the Lord to help me fight any infection. Anything is possible through His power and my faith, and when my will is aligned with His. That is what I was trying to prove through this exercise- it felt like a failure, but I believe it was a divine learning experience from which I will continue to glean knowledge and understanding line upon line.
I'm actually glad to have gone through the experience to have learned and gained so much!